Deep Thoughts - Text from God #TBT

I don't often write about God. Actually, this is a first. It might be because I'm not the most religious person. If I write about God, people would debate me, and I hate debates, and don't want to get into it. I don't go to church very often (much to my mother's dismay.) When we were in Seattle, I just never thought about it. Now that we have Bug, I want to take him to church, but it is right in the middle of nap time and the things I would be thinking during his meltdown wouldn't help me much. I swear like a sailor, but try to be a good person. I hope those offset each other.

I have a story that I have never told anyone. Ever. I think about it often, and decided to just write it down. I figured it's perfect for #TBT. At the end of this post you'll either think "Wow, she's crazy," or just "Wow."

Two years ago, before Bug was even a thought, I was having a crappy week. A really bad week. My horse was being retired, and being a pain in the butt at the rehab barn she was staying. I was having a really stressful week at work. Nothing was going right. You know the feeling.

I was leaving the barn where I worked. Usually that made me feel better, but something stressed me out. I don't remember what it was, but it was the icing on the cake. A friend and I were suppose to meet to for lunch, and she had to cancel. I decided to drive out to the rehab barn to see Denali and just sit.

Since I had no plans, I decided to text another friend to just say "hi." I often use voice text. I found her number and hit the little microphone and said, "Hi, hope all is well." I waited while my phone thought and I looked at the message before I sent it.

It said, "You know that I'm always here for you, I love you -God"

No shit, right hand up to...well, you know. At first I laughed at my phone and thought, "Oh how funny, you thought I said that!?" I decided to do it again, and repeated, "Hi, hope all is well." I waited while my phone was thinking, giggling to myself." I looked down and it said, "Hi, hope all is well." I did it a few more times, and got the same response each time.

I really wish I was able to take a screen shot, but no one would believe me anyway. I liketo think that things happen for a reason. My mother use to tell me that all the time, and I hated it, but she's right (like always.) I did get the text for a reason. It made me smile, and breath. So, does God have a cell phone? Was someone at Verizon being funny? Was I literally getting a message from God?

Rock and a Hard Place

Each Monday on my FBX Adventure page, I share the Random Acts of Kindness that others do, or have had done to them. There is so much bad in the world, that I like having one day that I just share the good. 

Here's the good that happened to me. 

Friday the Bug and I were out running errands. We were suppose to meet dad in town, and left the house to head out. around 4:30. As I headed down our hill, I heard the worse noise EVER. EVER. I wasn't sure if my tire was going to fall off or what. This noise has happened before, but I was the only one to hear it. I took my phone out, turned on the video camera and made my own version of the Blair Witch Project. AKA. I started driving and just held my phone out the window. 

I then called the Ford garage in town to just see if I could stop in to play the video to make sure my car would be safe to drive until Monday, or whenever they could get it in to fix. After all, it was 4:00 on a Friday, no one has time on a Friday.They told me to bring it on in and they'd take a listen.

Bug and I showed up and I played the video and the mechanic knew exactly what was wrong.  

There was a rock stuck in my brake pad. They took my car for a drive to figure out which tire, and then drove it straight into the garage and got right to work taking off my tire and checking my brakes. 

This might not sound like a huge deal to you, but to me it was. I'm sure they had a long week, and they didn't bat an eye making room for my car and making me feel safe to drive my car with the Bug.



When I went to pay for the 30 minutes of their time, they told me to not worry about it. That made me even happier. So, I wanted to do something nice for them. I decided on cookies. Who doesn't love chocolate chip cookies?

I do need to remind myself when baking cookies to NOT DOUBLE THE RECIPE. Big Red is good, but he's not THAT good. Don't worry, I hate 1/3 of the dough, so it was safe. 

Arctic Winter Games

Since the plague has left our house the Bug and I ventured out today. It was so nice to get out of the house for the first time in 4 days. I get cabin fever way too quickly.

The Arctic Winter Games are being held in Fairbanks this year. I did not realize a few things. 1. That the games are only every 4 years. 2. They rotate. The next time they have the games, they will be in Greenland.

Crap.

I wish I would have paid attention. This tends to be a problem of mine.

ANYWAY...back to the point of this post. Bug loves dogs. L-O-V-E-S dogs. I know I'm going to get talked into a dog before I actually want one. I am interested in dog mushing, so decided to take Bug to the 4 dog race. We went to watch the Junior race. It was really fun, which made me sadder about not attending more events.

I bundled Bug up as best I could (it was around 28 degrees today) and we were off. As I expected, he was thrilled. He didn't get as good of a nap as I hoped due to the asshole cats. (They decided that standing by his door SCREAMING was a good life choice.)  I was afraid he'd drift off before he saw the "das" but luckily, he was wide awake. 

This was my favorite team, only because of the story behind the dogs. The dogs were on their way to be killed, when they were saved by the father of the girls who run them now. They are from Nunavut. 

We stuck around to see the first team from Nunavut cross the finish line, along with the teams from Alaska. There were three other teams, but Bug was getting cranky, and he had been so good for so long, I assumed he was bored. 

We got back to the car and no sooner was the snowsuit off than he was at the front of the trunk jumping and squealing watching the dogs. Sigh. I guess he was just tired of the snowsuit.

In other news, Alaska is beautiful. Today may be the first day of Spring, but the only sign in Alaska that I've seen is that they came down our road and pushed the snow the whole way off the road. I CAN SEE THE ROAD. That's exciting. I don't really mind that it is 20+ degrees. I laugh when I think about how cold I "use" to be at 20+ degrees, but honestly, it is a different cold than in Seattle. It's not a wet cold.

Bug will be 11 months tomorrow...if you can tell me how to slow down time, let me know.

Blah!

Remember where I left the blog off on Monday? With my husband being sick? Well, Tuesday morning I woke up at 3 am S-I-C-K. Thanks Bug. I spent the next 24 hours being the biggest whiny baby ever. My poor husband was only really sick for 12 hours, but not me. I was lucky. I got to be sick for 24 hours, and still don't feel 100%.

A few things I don't understand. Bug was sick this weekend. Did it slow him down? AT ALL? No, not really. He was a little extra snuggly, but that's it. I spent the better part of the time laying on the bathroom floor. The other thing? I taught for 10 years (and hope to teach again in the fall) and even when H1N1 went through our school I was totally fine. Have a baby and POOF! Sick ALL-THE-TIME. Okay, okay, not ALL the time, but it feels like it.

So, not a whole lot new in AK. I mean, there MIGHT be something new, but I haven't left the house to find it out. Hopefully tomorrow we'll venture out to do something fun. Hopefully.

Oh! If you're on FB don't forget to check out the pinned post on the FBX Adventures page. 

Mondays Sux

Historically, Mondays hate me. The wonderful kiddos that I taught survived on a schedule. Throw two days that had a different schedule (aka: The Weekend) with a different schedule, often led to making Mondays harder...for everyone. No one likes Mondays. I think it is nature over nurture.

Today, today was no different. I am in the process of trying to get my teaching certificate in Alaska. I do not remember it being such a lengthy process when I got it in Washington. Today I learned a few things. 1. I need my Praxis scores to apply. 2. ETS (Testing center) only holds the scores for 10 years....I took them 11 years ago.

THIS made my life hard. Very hard. There are some teaching positions that I am applying for, and they close this week. I had no idea if I could do anything to get my Praxis scores. In addition I needed my Undergraduate transcripts.

I spent a total of 3 hours on the phone today. THREE. All while the Bug was being SO good. He watched TV, which he never really gets to do, but I needed to make phone calls TODAY and well....Sesame Street, it is pretty awesome....so is Daniel Tiger...THEN Nap, so he didn't melt his brain all day. I still felt horrible. The poor guy just wanted momma, and instead momma got to listen to HORRIBLE elevator music. I at least put the phone on speaker so he got to enjoy some of the fun too. Bug spent the better part of his day walking around. WALKING. Makes me happy and sad at the same time. Made me feel like I was wasting another day of his life. UGH.

In between making phone calls, and checking boxes, I was changing diaper, after diaper, after diaper. Poor guy still has diarrhea from his weekend puke/poop fest. He doesn't feel 100%, and I know this because he ACTUALLY watched Sesame Street and got into minimal things. Poor guy also has bad diaper rash. I've been putting everything on it that we have, and hopefully it will start feeling better soon.

A wonderful woman at the Alaska Education Department spent 45 minutes on the phone with me and walked me through how to solve my missing score problem. I still need to get some paperwork in order, but I can at least get a year certification while I find these difficult last pieces. (So think good thoughts.)

Right after this wonderful lady talked me off the cliff (not really, but I was pretty stressed out) my mom called. They are coming to visit in July and I am SO SO SO excited! (Did I mention that I was excited.)

So my no-good-very-bad Monday got better. On Monday's I post #RandomActsofKindness because #Mondaysarentsobad on my FBX Adventures Facebook page. Those helped me feel less crappy too. Yay.

Then my husband came home from work puking.....

Where's the Easy Button?

Living in Fairbanks, the land of snow and sun (because seriously, more sun than Seattle) I feel like I should be able to "do" something athletic in the winter. I have downhill skied since I was little...10 maybe? That is about it when it comes to winter sports that I can do. It's a little harder with a 10 month old to drop everything and just go skiing.

Other winter sports ideas? Ice Skating?

Never have I been able to stand up and actually skate (roller blade or ice skates.) I blame it on how tall I am and my center of gravity being at my knees....or it could be that Grace is my middle name and I can't walk and chew gum at the same time. Since I'm "so good" at roller blades, I figure I am even better at ice skating.

I did go skating  "once" as an adult. I took my middle school students, and they somehow talked me out onto the ice. Poor guys spent our entire 2 hours, trying to teach me how to skate. I taught a program for students with Emotional/Behavioral Disorders and I wish that every person who ever wrote them off as "bad" could have seen them that day (everyday actually, they were awesome.) SO patient, and so kind, keeping their teacher on her feet and spending their one field trip helping me. I still miss those kids.

ANYWAY. Long story short, Ice skating didn't work out.

Now that I've crossed that off my list,  next up is cross country skiing. I get the concept since you have to skate ski when downhill skiing to get across the flat parts at the bottom or runs. I'm good at that, how hard can cross country skiing be? HARD. I have officially gone twice as an adult and both times I hated it. HATED IT.

I really want to be able to do SOMETHING though...

I decided that I DO own cross country skis....I figured that today would be a good day to go give it try again. Why not? My husband and I packed everything we needed, packed the Bug and Bug supplies, and headed out. We drove down the hill into the valley behind our house. We go there, unloaded our skis, got bundled up and got the Bug's snowsuit and carrier ready for him (my husband was taking him, NOT me.)

We were ready to go! I was going to go cross country skiing and had high hopes of liking it. We went to grab the Bug....who had thrown up all over himself. Poor guy. He had puked earlier in the day but he was shoveling food and it went down the wrong pipe. We assumed it was a coincidence and that he couldn't be sick. He JUST got over being sick. Well...he doesn't feel well.

So, no skiing. We packed back up and took him home. I got to figure out how to take apart his car seat to wash it, and Bug's daddy gave him a bath. While being sick slowed him down, it didn't stop him...

A short while later we were getting dinner ready, and the Bug crawled over to his dad's guitar...his dad's 12 string that I bought him as a present years ago. Bug LOVES the guitar. Well, loved. He knocked it over and snapped the neck on it. Poof. Dead. I don't really think that Fairbanks has a ton of guitar repair stores. I'm sad. Really sad.

So today I learned that maybe I'm only meant to drink hot chocolate in the winter, don't let your kid lick the handle of the cart at Fred Meyers (okay...I didn't "let him" he was too quick for me, but that is what I blame for puking) and if your kid pukes, just stay home!

Look! I wrote a blog post.

It's been a week hu? Damn. How did that happen? I'm really sucking at this blogging thing.

Life has been busy this week. We had a handful of play dates, which are the best thing ever. 1. Bug is entertained. 2. I get to talk to adults. I do feel bad for the ladies though. I spend the majority of my time by myself, so sometimes I open my mouth and it doesn't close for two hours. Opps. (Consider this your public apology!)

Like I said. I don't get out much.

The Bug WAS getting a tooth, then it was gone, and now it's back. I didn't realize teeth could recede before they finally broke through. I know that is broken through now. Want to know how? He bit my toe. HOLY SMOKE that hurt. He laughed hysterically as I cried out....we need to work on timing.

In other Bug news he is really walking, although he still chooses crawling as his preferred mode of transportation.  Today he walked across our house, and while it is adorable it makes me incredibly sad. I can't believe he's going to be a year in a little over a month. I'm trying to not be sad about it, because we are lucky that he is growing, healthy, and happy. My sweet husband is helping me plan his birthday party. We still aren't sure what we're doing, but hey, at least we know we're having a party for him.

As for what we're getting him. We are having a hard time figuring that one out. He's only 1. While it is a big deal, it's not really a big deal. Does that make sense?  I think we are going to make him a busy board. We joked about starting a climbing wall for him, but it doesn't sound so crazy the more we think about it. We'd have to buy him a harness though, because if he's going to climb, he's going to learn to do it safely. A wall will probably be for a few birthdays from now though.

My ribs are still giving me trouble. THAT's fun. I went to the doctor that they referred me to in December....finally. He told me what was wrong...do I remember? No. I heard blah, blah, blah, blah, steroid shots into your ribs, blah. The shots into my ribs really made me perk up. No, no thank you. I'll live with the pain in my side. I go see him again next Friday.

Hopefully I write something between now and then..."hopefully."

We took Bug back to the Ice Park on Tuesday and he was able to actually get out of his stroller and go down slides and spin and have fun. The kid has ZERO fear. Nada. I think I should just wrap him in bubble wrap now, to be safe.

Luck

    First, let me tell you a story of how stupid I am....then pictures, LOTS of pictures. I promise.

     Safeway was having a deal on diapers today ($5.00 for 29 of them.) The Bug and I went to pick some up after his 9,937 doctor appointment. After leaving, we were driving up to meet some friends at the Archaeology conference. I was late, and the roads were good. NOT going fast (hello, baby in the car) but not doing my normal 10 miles below the speed limit.

     On our way to pick them up there was a train, so I did a quick U-turn and went on the highway so we wouldn't be too late. We picked up our friends, and went on our way again. The Bug started crying, so I looked for my wallet to hand him. He likes playing with it. No wallet. He started screaming and I remembered where I last saw my wallet...at Safeway...on the roof of the car....UGH. I started picturing my beloved Starbucks card, GONE, my credit cards needing to be canceled, ALL the fun stuff that happens when you lose your wallet. I jumped out of the car, and do you know what was on the roof of my car? I HAVE NO IDEA HOW.

     (I'll leave out the part where I did it again later on...I need a purse.)


     This afternoon we went to the Ice Park, where they have the World Ice Carving Championships. It was SO MUCH FUN. I had on jeans, so got a little chilly, but SO MUCH FUN. We bundled the Bug up really well in his stroller and with blankets and wandered around. Bug passed out about 3 minutes after we got there. There were AMAZING ice sculptures, spinning cups (you provide the spinning power) and ice slides. The slides were so much fun. Bug woke up towards the end and his daddy took him down a baby slide. He thought it was the BEST.THING.EVER, but we didn't want him in the cold for too long, so we left soon after. It was really cool (ha, get it, cool, ice, get it?)

Ok. I promised photos...

Babysitters Club

I might have the most active 10 month old known to mankind....okay, I know that isn't 100% true, but holy.smokes. Today was Mother Moose. It is at 10:30, and right smack dab in the middle of nap time. LUCKILY (sarcasm) Bug woke up at 5 am. I somehow convinced him that sleep was AWESOME and that he could sleep with momma if he'd just SLEEP. He is so stinking cute when we sleep together. He snuggles right up and melts my heart. 

Lucky for us, he was wide awake and ready to go to Mother Moose. He LOVES IT. It might be one of his favorite things EVER. Today it was really busy, and lots and lots of babies. His BFF's were all there. When we walked in he saw his friend that he hasn't seen in almost two months. He was just SO excited to see her. Other than using her to pull up, I "think" she was happy to see him too. 

During the story time, Bug made it his mission to try to get to every single infant in the room. I don't know what he's thinking, but he kept crawling towards them and then trying to smash them in the face. I "think" he really likes babies, but just doesn't understand how to interact with them. I hope that's the case. I'm sure I was "super" popular. 

When we first started going to Mother Moose I remember watching my friends babies crawling around, while my little Bug just sat there....oh, those were the days...sigh. I wish I could just sit there. 

During story time, I turned my back for .3 seconds. When I looked back, Bug wasn't playing where I had left him. I couldn't find him ANYWHERE. My heart stopped (not the first and not the last.) He was there, just quicker than I think he is. At one point he grabbed his buddy and they started to crawl OUT of the room. My kid was skipping class with his bestie. 

His besties mom and I followed them. They crawled across the library the whole way over to the fish tank. It's no short distance, and the kid didn't even look for me! Thanks for making me feel loved. Thanks a lot....

All in all, I needed a nap after story time. 

In other fun news, Bug had his first babysitter tonight (that wasn't family.) She's Italian, and a PhD student  in (something impressive) at the University. We had her over for dinner on Saturday and he LOVED HER. She came tonight and he melted. I'm glad he liked her so much. Bug's dad and I went to dinner at his Archaeological conference. I've learned my lesson in the past, stayed for just the dinner part and left before the talks started. Not saying that the talks aren't interesting....it's just that they aren't interesting (unless you're an archaeologist.) I came home to a passed out baby. Hopefully he had a good time and is now fluent in Italian (that was my request when I left the house.) 

Bug has some other exciting news too. This morning he fell flat on his face (no, that's not it.) When I checked his face, I noticed that FINALLY we have a tooth coming in. I see it! 10+ months and no teeth, but it's almost here! 

Hope everyone has a great weekend. 

These are the days of our lives....

I spent most of my life looking forward to something. I use spent the week looking forward to Fridays. I spent the month looking forward to the next month (payday.) I spent whole seasons looking forward to summer. I wished away whole parts of my life. 

That is the main thing that I'm trying to change. I wished away the first two weeks of Bug's life. Today, I found myself today looking forward to his nap time so I could sit down for .2 seconds. Then I stopped, and looked at him. I realized that after nap time he'd be bigger, older, and for now I need to stop looking forward to things and enjoy the now. Enjoy every second of his life and hopefully raise him to enjoy the now, and not count away the days of his life too. 

It is hard to believe that he will be one in 40+ days. CRAZY. 

It amazes me how much Bug is growing. He's a little toddler, but I don't want to admit that...EVER. He is doing awesome at learning new things, and cracks me up with his cleaning. 

I'm trying to get in as much momma and me time now as I can. At the end of April I am going to start watching Bug's new BFF. He will be 3 months old then, so we probably won't be going out a whole lot. (This will be the true test of if Bug will ever have a sibling.) 

Yesterday we went to the Children's Museum. Bug LOVES it. After a year, he costs $7.00 to get in and if I'm anything I'm two things: 1. Cheap and 2. Bad liar. I already got a weird look when I told the girl that he was only 10 months. He's not exactly small. He puts EVERYTHING in his mouth. EVERYTHING. It's hard to not worry that he'll catch something and get sick again. He's finally feeling better and we are able to go out and be around other babies again. 

Creamers Field

It is nice to be home. Let's just start there. Yes, I miss my family horribly, but there is just something about your own bed. 

The Bug and I went grocery shopping yesterday (I really need to figure out couponing.) He loves the cart (thankfully) and we could spend hours roaming the store. 

At some point last night I did something to my back. It might be a rib out of place, but whatever it is, it's inconvenient. 

Today we wanted to do something as a family, finally. We were away for 5 weeks. We went to Creamers Field and took Bug out for a stroll in his new Bob stroller. We bundled him up and were off. 

It was beautiful. So much blue sky!! 

The Bug fell asleep a bit into our walk, so we walked farther. I never realized how beautiful Alaska is in the winter. 

We had Bug's babysitter over for dinner tonight. It is so scary (for me) to leave him with someone. She seems awesome and he loved her. 

I made fish tacos and they turned out pretty awesome. I became a great host towards the end of dinner, my back was just killing me. I laid down and didn't get back up (didn't? Couldn't?) Such an awesome host.